Saturday, September 18, 2010

fear of living in china

In the dream I was in china, in a poverty tunnel area, there is a woman that I am talking to her, she is kind and nice, I like talking to her but I was fear to stay there as I could be mistreated by the corrupted government and people over there, that I do not want to stay or I was very cautious while staying there. I also feeling sad (sighed) and have sympathy on her and those that need to live inside the tunnel.

fear of living in China|Poverty(10 points):
word that will most assist me: commonalty 平民, indigent 貧窮

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to live in poverty for I would lack of protection and suffer.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that it is oneness in equality and should work in achieving|reaching everyone being take care of not avoiding being poverty.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear live in china in poverty that everyone is surviving and cheating each other like animals.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear for people that might trick gain advantage and harm me when they are poor.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in dirty and poor environment not realizing that it is the people that I live with matters not the environment that I am living in.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear of being a commonalty and suffer.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to live in luxury and being rich.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize luxury and rich is pirating and sucking making the and the commonalty to nurture the rich instead of everyone being supported within oneness equality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to get high and luxurious living not realizing those are energetic stimulation with serious consequences and will not last.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear living in poverty country I will be extremely exploited and I can't do anything about it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear of being indigent and suffer.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear of need to suffer at the bottom of the enslavement pyramid and being indigent.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear of being poor|indigent and being enslaved by the rich.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear of being enslaved as indigent but just try to climb the enslavement pyramid but do nothing to help|assist in achieving oneness equality, making heaven on earth.

Within seeing me fear of indigent I stop and breathe and work my way in making heaven on earth.

I have dream about Robin for two nights, at the first night I ignore it and on the second night he appear again in my dream. I guess it's the interdimentions forcing me to face my problems. I was his friend for over ten years, to me he is a very always said nothing on the surface but vicious inside always trying to take advantages from people around him, so I don't value him as my friend that much, I am almost like being as friend with him but I am always cautious about him. for some reasons, one year, I don't know how the white light has preprogrammed our lifes, he met a girl wingie who worked there and every guys over there wants to be her boyfriend and I was attracted to her sex appeal too, sometimes I would very much wonder if I met her again and she's bald with only her true nature true essence would I be that much fond of her want to be with her, so he's with her and I was based on the equality principle thinking that it is her matter of who she wants to be and approach her, well she has been dating with different guys boys at that time, and somehow she told Robin of what I have said to her and of course, because of he sees her as a possession and want to possess her, he makes it as a big deal of me betraying him and stuff like that, so that's how we got separated in our friendship.

In the dream, I met him again, and he's kind of still angry inside, I told him that we can keep hating each other this way forever or we can set aside and continue walk our path. In the dream he understand what I mean and become friendly with me again, of course it's in the dream not in real life, yet. In the second dream we are just talking, I forgot the details.

to Robin (7 points), MC -> reset 重接斷骨, unthinkable
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate robin because of his reactions to me in posession to wingie.
I forgive myself that I haven't accept and allowed myself to realize that we are all oneness in equality and what I pursuit of wingie's just her sexual appearance.
I forgive myself that I haven't accept and allowed myself to forgive robin and reset our relationships.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I have totally blame on robin for being obsessed and possessed on wingie and narrowing his sight of blaming me as the all fault.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame since robin has been using me all along for over 10 years in trying to gain advantages from my family so he deserves me being dishonest to him.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame robin for standing in the middle so me and wingie don't stand a chance and denied to accept him and rest our relationship.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame robin for being cunning and denied to be friends with him not realize he is reflecting I am cunning.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate robin for being selfish not realizing that it is me that is being selfish.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get angry at robin because of wingie and blaming him for shattering my chance of pursuing wingie.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to treat robin as an unthinkable unacceptable person.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see robin as disgusting to think about him.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself do not want to see robin and face him.

Within seeing the pattern I want to get angry at robin i breathe and stop and assist him accordingly.
Within seeing the pattern that I don't want to see him I breathe and stop the reactions coming forth.


In the dream I don't even remember with who or what circumstances I am remote controlling these little z-gundam robots and fighting one little robots to another robots. I still remember in one battle I break the opponent robot's arm or something then the opponent feel screwed this time, and I don't want to but I have to and keep going tear his robot's arm off.


battling in games of z-gundam robots, MC -> merciless 殘忍 (4 points)

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a mean and merciless person.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use survival as a reason to morph myself into a merciless person.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think merciless is the most useless and a sign of week in the universe.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself that I don't need to treat people mercy because I only have one life and I need to always climb to the top of the pyramid and be a dominator.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that we are all oneness and equal and being mercy is being mercy to me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to treat mercy as weak.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be selfish and not being mercy and kind to others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that a strong man do not allow mercy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look for energetic excitement flow in brutal 殘忍
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress my brutality nature.

1 comment:

  1. Fred, you have defined being rich as something bad and thus are not allowing yourself to become rich. You see, there is nothing wrong with being rich per se. It is only the way that one becomes rich and the way someone uses money, that can be abusive. One can for example become rich by inheriting the wealth or by receiving donation and also by honest work. We all want to become rich and live in abundance and Equal Money System is to make everyone equally rich. So I suggest to look at and clear this points of any judgements.

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