Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Anger Primary Pattern Point

On ID/Change the most important primary pattern point for my angryness: Dictionary.

E, 373-415, 373-394, 376 L - Easy

On Y/N is it because I don't take things Easy - Y

Most efficient way to handle my primary pattern point: writing, Mind construct

Angry about Valentin.
Ranting Raving:

I felt I was over paid and Valentin is slow in response. The overpaid is not a main issue I think I over paid like $30 at most but it's he is not responding me that cause me frustrated. I was late in sending my photo to him but when I send him something or amendments or ask him questions - he talks back to me at least 6-7 days and postponing my design right now I check the record it beings at January and it's closing to the end of February. I see it as both of our faults I am not blaming him totally. I sometimes even wonder is the designing work actually not as easy as what I think? However from what I see/compare to Joe's works at least Joe takes care of my eye bag's problem and I didn't see Valentin has done anything to fix on his version. What I felt annoyed at most is he has a tendency to ignore my emails or he is that busy that I would get a response in 6-10 days. I mean I ask him to work because he accept to charge me when I got my first deal and he is a Destonian. I also know Joe's very busy and he has ignored me for a week too but when I asked him is he going to finish my flyer he did response back and explain to me. When Valentin keep on only response me in 7-10 day the more I felt sky rocket high because at the same time I am paying licensing fees each day the realestate market is hot and I don't have the flyers and business card to do cold canvasing even when I am prepared and it looks like Valentin is going to delay more.


Mind construct:

I felt I was overpaid and Valentin is slow in response.
->He is not responding me.
->->I am frustrated.

->When I send him instructions it takes him at least 6-7days to responsond.
->->I am not blaming him totally but he is also responsible for the delay.

->Valentin's photo re-touch is not as attentive as Joe.
->I ask him to do the design only because he is a Destonian and he allows me to pay him when I got my first deal.
->I felt annoyed when he has a tendency to reply me in 6-10days.
->->I don't have the flyers and business card to do cold-canvasing.
->->->Looks like he is going to delay further.

Self-forgiveness:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame Valentin ignoring me and slow in response not realizing it is what I did and accepted and allowed in that past that is causing such events to happen on me.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that ignoring people can delay and causing extreme annoyance in people.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to take self-responsibility and take care of what I am responsible and do my part work as a team.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that I am working as a team with other people in real life.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to consider others and putting myself into their positions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself only care about my Life and don't consider taking everything as a whole and do what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to direct the situation and handle properly instead of blaming Valentin as the cause of my anger and frustration.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself for pulling myself into the pit of becoming a realtor and go through endeavour after endeavour and I cannot rest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame Joe and Valentin for I am paying them and I expect them to work for me or support me legitimately.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I only have one person and can't handle all of these stuffs that require to become a successful realtor.

The primary pattern point that I still need to be more specific: 2 points

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