Nettle - the word assist/guide me the most in Breath Orgasm

I used muscle communication to look for word that can most assist me in Breath Orgasm, I really want to achieve Breath Orgasm but having no progress so far. I also tested out what would be most appropriate in handling it through: Self-forgiveness, breath it out, write about it. It tested out as - write it out so I am going to write about Nettle about breath orgasm.

I have always wanted to achieve breath orgasm because masturbation has always been my self-defined self-valued as what I am, as I am masturbation without masturbation then there is no meaning of fun and it's like there would be no purpose of my fun/life. I was very obsessed into pictorial masturbation, of course I didn't know about all the consequences of pictorial masturbation.

About the nettle, I feel very frustrated(not exactly frustrated but feeling impatience) that even kids like Ryan can achieve breath orgasm. I was a bit worried and getting frustrated for I am not getting any reaction at all, like I try to distribute the energy through out my body but nothing is felt, I don't even know where the energy is located. It's like I am not getting any progress, I worry that I am too old I mean else why would I not feeling any progress or response in breath orgasm. I mean when I see other kids they are in their vlogs it's like they totally just do it just like that. not much details and why I am not getting any progress i mean at least some progress would encourage me - I am getting there, if I have some progress it's a sign that I am getting there but I have no progress/no signs. I am a bit worry and worry about that I am not getting progress. The only progress that I have tonight is chatting with kelly that she told me she can do it with distributing the "energy" farthest away through out her body, I asked her whether it's the "feeling" because feeling is energy that you feel good about that and we discussed it she said it is or could be. then I started playing with it trying to distribute the feeling I still haven't associate the distribution with breath yet.

It's like the nettle comes from I always want to haste myself want to have progress to prove that I am on the right track and without evidence/signs of progress on breath orgasm I can't rest in peace. Because I know I am stuck in masturbation, although I am not using pictures at this moment the body still being sucked dry that I really like to divert my addiction on masturbation to become an expression of breath orgasm that - before I can get rid of stand alone of energy at least I get rid of masturbation - using breath orgasm as an substitute. That's why I am hasting myself urging myself wanted to have progress on breath orgasm.

When I see them making vlogs saying how it's like it really seems it's as simple as that and why to me it's so difficult? makes me really want talking to them ask them but so far, I found kelly only.

Do I need to be more specific in writing the point Nettle? N

After writing it out, I feel like those worries or haste that "tangled" inside me, like the "weight" energetic weight was released like doing self-forgiveness that the "burden" is lightened. So writing out did release the sub or un-conscious uneasyness inside my body. I was prepared to write (many) self-forgiveness on the point nettle.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I do not have any progress on breath orgasm that I might kept on obsessed into masturbation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I am particularly dumb in learning including breath orgasm.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself want to use progress to prove that I am not particularly dumb.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself aiming at having progress and feeling uneasy when I am not having any progress in breath orgasm.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to envy ryan for such a young age and able to achieve breath orgasm.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge ryan not realizing he is as self as me that he is me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I might not suitable able to learn breath orgasm.

Within seeing the pattern of fear I might not able to learn breath orgasm I stop and breath and remind myself if I can masturbate then I can move the sex energy and I did have progress on realizing the sex feeling is the energy.

Reluctant to change me:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I would need to suffer pain if I really change myself into equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself pretending that I am walking to be a better person in equality while not actually changing myself through self-forgiveness and corrective application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to afraid if I change myself into equality that I might need to experience what the chickens, poultries' pain for being cut and eaten.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear changing means there will be no more fun and fun only defines through some must sacrifice.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear actually changing me means have to experience both the joy and pain together.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself enjoy with others as self need to suffer.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear of taking turns in being the suffering polarity end.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself obsessed into being the elite with lots of money.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself realizing changing myself to equality is the key.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself obsessed into pictorial masturbation that every time it's only split of a second and I gain nothing during the process.

Within seeing my pattern of not wanting to change me to equality I stop and breathe and remind myself there is always consequences that I cannot escape.

Within seeing my pattern of want to act egoly I stop and breathe and remind myself there is always consequence and how I treat everything is just another me as self.

MC - Do I need to be more specific on Reluctant to change me? Y

MC - Number of primary pattern points I need to be more specific on? 12

The most important primary pattern point I need to be specific on Reluctant to change me:

Emotion A, 50 - Adherence

On Y/N is it I haven't Adhere to my self-forgiveness points? Y

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to adhere to my self-forgiveness points.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself treating self-forgiveness as once I write the statements out then I don't need to remember it anymore.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to adhere to I am using self-forgiveness to forgive and change me.

On Y/N do i need to be more specific on the point Adhere? Y

On ID/Change the number of point I need to be specific on? 8

On ID/change the word that will most elaborate on the point Adherence:

Dictionary S, 1019-1197, 1019-1108, 1066-1108, 1068 (L first later corrected to R) - Shamble

The most efficient way to handle point Adherence - Shamble: write SF(Y), write it out, talk with someone, breath through it(Y)

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear of Self-forgiveness because I can't write self-forgiveness out and see the points in changing me clearly then I refuse to write self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I haven't accept and allow myself to breath through situations when I can see the points continue writing self-forgiveness in changing me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put myself in slow paste and not aiming at clearing steering changing me through self-forgiveness and corrective application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself because I can't write self-forgiveness out smoothly so I walk writing my self-forgiveness slowly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think there is always time and as long as I am writing self-forgiveness I will be fine.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel discouraged because I don't see an obvious change in myself through self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel self-forgiveness is tedious because I cannot see the points in how to change me in what way quickly and stop writing self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think as long as I am blank then it means there is no more points for me to write on the pattern point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think if I am blank that means I am perfect I don't need to write self-forgiveness anymore.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself using excuses not wanting to face myself for what I have become.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to do just a bit of self-forgiveness to make myself feel better that I have done my part of cleaning myself but haven't fully want to change me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself aiming at having a blank stage so I don't have to face and change me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself subtly wanted to stay at my current living standard and do not want to change me into equality.

MC - do I need to be more specific on the point Shamble - Y

The primary pattern points I still need to be more specific on - 6

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself using my blankness and slow progress in self-forgiveness and do not want to do self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself using sub-consciously resisting to do self-forgiveness as an excuse so that I apparently cannot do efficient self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself fearing if I see all the points I need to change myself and do self-forgiveness on I can't live my old way of living and won't have any fun.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself need to confess for what I did what I have accepted and allowed in the past and can't do them again.

I forgive myself that I haven't accept and allow myself to realize I have to unconditionally give up what is not supporting oneness and equal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself fearing people might know and see what I have done, accept and allow in the past and feeling embarrassing as not willing to unconditionally changing me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear people knowing my strong desires for masturbation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resisting in looking back at what I have done in the past and using blakness as an excuse to not correct myself not changing myself.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see what I can do to change myself fit into oneness equality through seeing self-forgiveness points.

MC - Do I need to be more specific on the point I do not want to see self-forgiveness points? N

MC - Do I need to be more specific on I don't want to see my self-forgiveness points? Y

The number of primary pattern points I need to be more specific on I don't want to see my self-forgiveness points - 1